Alchemist Song - T-Shirt
Alchemist Song - T-Shirt
Size Chart
Size Chart
Classic unisex fit.
Couldn't load pickup availability
30-Day Guarantee
$75+ Ships Free
Free Returns
High Quality
Original Designs
Secure Checkout
When science meets pop — and lead turns to gold.
“Lead Single (Alchemist Song)” features a medieval alchemist earnestly singing while stirring a crucible labeled Pb (lead). The text riffs on the pop-anthem rhythm:
“We’re gonna add, add philosopher’s stone here —
🎶🎵🎶
Gonna be, gonna be gold, man!”
It’s a clever fusion of chemistry humor, alchemical history, and pop-culture parody — designed for nerds with rhythm and dorks with style.
✔ Premium unisex tee (Gildan 64000)
✔ Medieval-engraving line art style
✔ Available in black, navy, royal, white, and natural
✔ Designed by Dork Matter 🧠✨
Details
Details
✔ Gildan 64000
✔ 100% ring-spun cotton
✔ 4.5 oz/yd² (153 g/m²)
✔ Shoulder-to-shoulder taping
✔ Quarter-turned to avoid crease down the center
✔ Blank product sourced from Bangladesh, Nicaragua, Honduras, Dominican Republic, Haiti or Guatemala
Disclaimer: Due to the fabric properties, the White color variant may appear off-white rather than bright white.
Age restrictions: For adults
EU Warranty: 2 years
Other compliance information: Meets the flammability, lead, cadmium, phthalates and formaldehyde level requirements.
In compliance with the General Product Safety Regulation (GPSR), Artur Pachota GravGraf ensures that all consumer products offered are safe and meet EU standards. For any product safety related inquiries or concerns, please contact us at support[at]dorkmatter.co
Washing Instructions
Washing Instructions
Follow these steps to keep your t-shirts looking fresh and ready to wear!
✔ Wash and Dry Inside Out
✔ Use Low Temperatures & Gentle Detergents
✔ Avoid Excessive Spinning
✔ Air Dry When Possible
✔ Iron Inside Out on Low Heat
Shipping & Returns
Shipping & Returns
Shipping
✔ FREE SHIPPING on orders over $75!
✔ Typically shipped within 7 days of placing the order.
✔ Once shipped, please allow 2-5 days for delivery.
Returns
Our goal is for you to love your order and strive for 100% satisfaction guarantee. Please contact us if something isn’t right.
✔ Incorrect, damaged, or defective items are eligible for a full refund.
✔ Refund requests must be made within 30 days of the purchase date.
For refund inquiries, please contact us at support[at]dorkmatter.co
Eligibility for a Refund
✔ Product received is damaged or defective.
✔ The request is made within 30 days of purchase.
✔ Item must be unused and returned in its original condition.
For any return questions, contact us at: support[at]dorkmatter.co
This refund policy is subject to change at any time and without notice.
The Dork Matter Difference
Original Designs
We’re not judging you by your status, popularity, or even IQ. Okay… maybe just by the T-shirts you wear. Just kidding.
What really matters is the idea behind the design. We focus on smart concepts, nerdy humor, and visuals that feel thoughtful rather than generic. Every design is here because it earned its place.
Made for you. Shipped Fast.
Your shirts are printed to order — not pulled from a dusty shelf. This keeps things efficient, reduces waste, and makes sure what you get is made just for you.
We move fast once you order and ship as soon as your tees are ready.
Orders over $75 ship free.
30-Day Money-Back Guarantee
Try your shirts risk-free. If something isn’t right, you have 30 days to return them — no stress, no awkward explanations.
Returns are free, and if there’s a problem with your order, we’ll make it right. Our goal is simple: you should be happy wearing it. If you’re not, we’ll fix it.